In the future, everything will taste like everything.
Smart, huh?
Every Lip Balm Sends A Message
I did an entry about a “Lip Balm Tub” which struck me as just the right combination of one syllable words with the letter “P” or “B” in it to make fun of.
Recently, I found even more examples of this marketing madness and it’s madness: Who knew that putting your brand on something for chapped lips could change the world as we know it. My favorites:
THE TIN!!
THE LANYARD!!
THE CARABINER!!
THE BALLS!!!
THE VARIETY!!
THE ENTIRE COLLECTION
(from Totally Promotional dotcom)
As the great advertiser David Ogilvy once said:
Market to chapped lips and your brand will shine.
If you want to reach back to the origins of this, link below.
The original Lip Balm Tub marketing madness
Store Window Display Task Host Force Restart
The window display of the Loft store at one of the most prominent locations on planet earth, 42nd and Broadway, should make a strong impression.
But what is this? It looks … hmm … can’t really see much on display here.
Well now wait a second, there is SOMETHING.
Yes it’s a Windows Error in the Window.
From Meerkat National Bank
Meerkats are small animals.
Meerkats spend a lot of time underground.
Meerkats know absolutely nothing about cybersecurity.
They are cute … I’ll give them that.
Artisanal Cotton Candy Was Sold Out
It’s like a carnival-in-a-bag.
If You Are Advertising Then You Are Advertising Already
This is sort of a recursive version of that sign near a development off the highway that says, “If you lived here you’d be home by now.”
But by this logic, if YOU are reading this and your CUSTOMERS are reading this then why don’t you just go talk to your customers who are reading this over your shoulder instead of advertising inside a shopping cart??
This Is Why They Don’t Let Dogs Shop
Because a dog wouldn’t care if this looked like a Doritos bag or Lays potato chips. 
Then again, dogs don’t carry cash so they couldn’t buy this anyway.
Can’t Build Me I’m The Gingerbread House (in a box)!
Skip the mixing, the rolling pin, the cookie cutter, the oven and the baking and just open the box and EAT the damned crap!
Yes, nothing goes better with the spicy, sweet flavor of gingerbread than a candy that is so sour it makes you gag and pucker!!
This sour patch kid looks pissed off because he’s been stuck to the side of a house.
Includes Oreo cookies!?! I had NO idea!!!
Because With Global Warming There Is Less Snow!
Plus … it’s a lot cleaner! And it’s a new use for one of the more heinous forms of non-biodegradable waste!
Check out the helpful reminder:
How ’bout the game of “Destroy The Planet With Toxic Waste!!”
Give A Sh#$. It’s The Least You Could Do…
Sorry for cursing. This one was asking for it.
