September 2, 2009

When Does A Mere Bite Become Mega?

The prefix "mega," which is Latin for incredibly, stupidly huge, gets a workout here being applied to something that simply can't be made mega.  A "bite" is anything you can tear with your incisors and shove into the cavity of your mouth.  That can't be mega no matter what level of competitive eater you are.  What we have here is copy for copy's sake.  "We can't just call it 'bite' ... what about 'giant' ... 'huge' ... uh, hey 'mega!'" 

(N.B. I'll admit the photo doesn't do this poor cookie justice; this was one of those cookies that's the size of a pizza.)

megabite_3.jpg

copy for copy's sake, food, packaging
Posted by lee sachs at 10:08 PM | | TrackBacks (0)

September 1, 2009

Images Courtesy of Goth Stock Photo Dungeon

geek2geek_dating_banner.jpg

For the geek dating site www.gk2gk.com, they had to feature some form of hottie up there.  So the pale skin, red lips, no smile, pitch black hair Goth Chick gets top billing.  Don't smile honey. Remember, this is an online dating service for total dweebs who are going to obsessively Twitter about you instead of stalking.  Feel the love.

Posted via email from Lee's posterous


banners, copy for copy's sake, stock photos
Posted by lee sachs at 12:00 AM | | TrackBacks (0)

August 31, 2009

I'm Sorry This Balloon Is An Impulse Purchase

Stuff at the supermarket checkout counter are last-minute items: a pack of gum, tabloids about celeb cellulite and a...MYLAR BALLOON THAT SAYS YOU'RE SORRY??!
sorry_balloon2.jpg
sorry_balloon1.jpgThe rest of the balloons on these checkout lines are of the "Happy This" "Happy That" variety.  Somehow, a message on floating, helium-inflated shiny material that says "I'm Sorry" just seems sad.  Maybe I'm reading into this too much.  Maybe...but I am not sorry. 


supermarkets
Posted by lee sachs at 11:44 PM | | TrackBacks (0)

August 30, 2009

Just What The World Needs: Cloroxymoron

Got the wordplay in the headline?  I'll explain.  Clorox, AKA Branded Chlorine Bleach came out with a new line of products called "Green Works" that's healthy, green, biodegradable, natural, perfect, endorsed by The Sierra Club ... shit, TREES AND MUSKRATS are using this stuff to tidy up. 

clorox_healthy_noWay.jpg

Alas, The Clorox Company (AKA, the company that still sells billions of gallons of a household cleaning fluid that can literally dissolve clothing) feels SO guilty about their flagship product, they had to redeem themselves.  That's like the Colombian drug lord who gives to the nearby poor people for respect.  Albeit, Colombian drug lords don't advertise how wonderful they are to the world. 

green marketing, packaging
Posted by lee sachs at 1:20 AM | | TrackBacks (0)

August 26, 2009

We're Not Making Money At You, We're Making Money WITH You

I'm wondering if there's a "Prepositional Attorney" who has to review this kind of language.  "Well, you can say 'with' and you can say 'from' but if you say 'off' you that's tricky.  Can you say, 'We make money.  And you make money... too, except we make more than you because we're a profit-making venture and you're just a customer.  We make money ON you.  In fact, we're banking on you to give us more of your money.  Because we're a bank.  Ally Bank.'  Yeah...that's it!

ally_bank.jpg

copy for copy's sake, financial services
Posted by lee sachs at 5:04 PM | | TrackBacks (0)

August 24, 2009

I Also Got Rid of My Lower Teeth!

Somewhere there's a cardinal rule that before and after pics should resemble each other.  And after should look better.  The "stay-at-home mom" was so busy shooting her mouth off about how white her teeth got, that when they snapped the pic, she opened too wide.  This also gives us a nice view of her tongue, which has a bit of a roast beef hue to it.  HURL!

bad_teeth_whitened2.jpg


bad graphics, bad photos, health, pharmaceuticals
Posted by lee sachs at 9:20 PM | | TrackBacks (0)

August 22, 2009

The economy may not depressed, but YOU might be!

For marketing Seroquel, an anti-depressant, the media buyers had a great idea:

Sell it to people out of a job looking for work!  Brilliant, just brilliant!

depression_job_board.jpg

banners, pharmaceuticals
Posted by lee sachs at 12:21 AM | | TrackBacks (0)

August 20, 2009

How Do I Become A Question Mark?

MMM_how_do_i.jpg

How?  First you start with a face...

mmm_how_head.jpg

Add some hair...

how_hair.jpg

Then just pick out some clothes!!!

how_clothes1.jpghow_clothes2.jpg


avatars, banners, graphic design
Posted by lee sachs at 10:33 PM | | TrackBacks (0)

August 19, 2009

When In Doubt, Pun Until You Puke

A newsletter is a great way to connect with customers, communicate innovations and, uh, dunno...let's say, "extend the brand."  Which means....PUNS!  Lots of 'em.  Here the "Mileposts" newsletter, given to all weary Metro-North commuters in the NYC area, demonstrates its consistent efforts to shove a pun in every sentence.

metronorth_newsletter.jpg
...And don't worry about being penalized with extra downs if you fall asleep on the train.  Our coaches have coaches that wake you before you reach the train yard-age.  And you can quarterback your way to a comfortable seat listening to audibles and be a wide receiver that ... ahh.... this pun thing is HARD!

copy for copy's sake, newsletters, puns
Posted by lee sachs at 10:30 PM | | TrackBacks (0)

August 16, 2009

It's A Door Decoration!!

We're kinda' into a meta-marketing thing here as this door decoration is sorta' advertising to the world, "It's A Girl!."  But we really need to keep our focus on the manufacturer who is selling this excrement.  So what do they put on the package to make it irresistible?
itsAgiRL_door.jpg

A couple of found-them-walking-around 'models' featuring a guy with the most stilted "Aww...look at her!" expression I've seen since "Rosemary's Baby."  Then again, he is obviously looking at a pile of towels, so maybe he couldn't get into character. 
itsAgiRL_door_dad.jpg

packaging, stock photos
Posted by lee sachs at 11:29 PM | | TrackBacks (0)

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This site is a creation of Lee Sachs and Cool Pillows, Inc. Yes, that's me, Lee Sachs (aka, coolpillows). If you have questions, comments, concerns, combustion or cartloads of other words that begin with "c," "k" or "q" please feel free to email me at lee DOT sachs at symbol gmail DOT com. (you can figure out what i'm trying to say there, right?)

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