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January 27, 2010

Help Us Save Trees. Don't Buy This.

Green marketing and advertising, like all marketing and advertising, tries to convince you of the impossible.  In this case, the company that cuts down trees and uses paper is really saving trees.  Here we have Marcal toilet tissue, with the banner "New Name, New Look, Improved Product" so you know it has to be a lie. 
marcal_crop.jpg

Let us deconstruct. 

You've got the product name in all lower-case, "small steps" so it seems harmless and cute with a little arrow in the p making you feel like you're practically turning back the clock to a smaller steppier kind of time:
marcal_recycleP.jpg

You've got this "Help Us Save 1 Million Trees" declaration smack in the middle, almost seeming like this is a campaign you can sign up for (there is no campaign, btw)
marcal_savetrees.jpg

And again with the saving the trees crap, except, tell me: If they've been in the business of making paper since 1950, how can they be saving trees?  Isn't paper, uh, made from trees?  Don't they have to cut them down in order to make the paper??
marcal_CU2.jpg




green marketing, supermarkets
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January 25, 2010

Come Visit! We Have A Nice Prison!

The brown of the sign and the "Heritage Area" has a nice feeling to set it off from the other signs around it.  This must be a nice area with some heritage, right? 
singsing_sign_CU1.jpgsing-sing_CU1.png


Unfortunately, this is for the town of Ossining (yeah, my town) -- a town formerly named "Sing Sing" until they decided to change it because people thought living in Sing Sing meant you lived in prison. 

sing_sing_LG.gif

So what's wrong with a little subtle tower graphic that bears a little resemblance to the tower where the guards stand watch with semi-automatic weapons ready to shoot if someone tries to escape.  That's Our Heritage! 






graphic design, logos, new york, ossining, travel
Posted by lee sachs at 8:52 AM | | TrackBacks (0)

They Stood Within Us!

From a website of a financial services company that will remain nameless, comes generic copy and generic stock photo nonsense.  Another one of those phrases that, given some thought, make absolutely no sense whatsoever. 

"They did more than stand behind us.  They stood beside us."
theystoodOnTopOfUs_mod3.jpg

Oh really?  Why would you even want them behind you?  Shoving you out front, taking the bullets while they stand behind you?  And what's the big deal of them standing beside you?  You're still ... you...so what if you have "them?"  That's not gonna save you.  I guarantee, the minute you try to tell everybody, 'Look, they're standing beside me' they'll be gone in a flash and you'll be pointing to thin air. 

copy for copy's sake, financial services, stock photos
Posted by lee sachs at 12:06 AM | | TrackBacks (0)

January 22, 2010

Quick Gimme A Banner With Cellphones...HURRY!

Some poor designer had to whip this one up in a hurry, no doubt.  I love the thinking that says , sure people will know these are cellphones, just look at them. 
Verizon_free_cellphones_mod.jpg


Yeah, just look at them.
  

verizon_free_cellphone_slide2.jpg
Verizon_free_cellphones_slice1.jpg

banners, graphic design, verizon, wireless
Posted by lee sachs at 11:11 AM | | TrackBacks (0)

January 20, 2010

Discover Exotic Cultures and Eat Them

This from my friend Josh, who spotted Marketing Madness in the sushi display.  Obviously taken in some big box warehouse joint called Wegmans where the ceiling is just raw pipes and fork lifts roam the aisles. 

sushi_cheapo.jpg

Discover the Orient with Sushi??!  Is that really discovering the Orient, eating raw fish?  Can't I just go on the web and look at pictures of Japan instead of eating their crazy food?  Why are you scaring me with this stuff?? 

groceries, signs, supermarkets
Posted by lee sachs at 8:31 AM | | TrackBacks (0)

January 19, 2010

Don't Get All Siffy With Me!

sci_fi_logo.jpg  DOESN'T SOUND LIKE syfy_logo-thumb-550x400A.jpg
The SciFi (pronounced "sigh  f-eye") channel changed its name/logo to "Syfy (which I insist should be pronounced, "Siffee" to rhyme with "iffy.") 

There's some legal reason for this pertaining to the fact that you can't really own a genre such as Science Fiction.  So, after all the lawyers and all the branding consultants and all the printers and designers were paid to create new stationary and business cards (and whole forests of old business cards went to the landfill), you can be sure that money was well spent.  I mean no one would spend tens of millions to change a company name unless it meant big piles o' money in return. 
 
siffy_final_layers_FLAT.png

Sounds IFFY to me.....


branding, logos
Posted by lee sachs at 5:59 PM | | TrackBacks (0)

January 17, 2010

Why Don't They Call It "TRIPS Yogurt?"

trixyogurt_glasses_madness.jpg
I can sort of follow the marketing chain of absurdity here.  Trix, a vaguely fruity breakfast cereal, has a mascot rabbit crazy about the product.  "Extending the brand" brought us the wonder of Trix Yogurt: kids could actually like yogurt because it has so much sugar, color, flavoring and no connection to anything healthy that might make them run the other way. 

Why the Trix Rabbit is holding up a colored yogurt cup eyeglasses, one of which has a symbolic yin-yang swirl on it, is just beyond any comprehension.  I guess it makes people look at the package.  But what is the Trix Rabbit actually seeing that makes him so damn happy?

extending the brand, graphic design, packaging
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January 16, 2010

Join The Museum! It's So Totally Whoa and Great, Like, Shopping, y'know!? Awesome!

So here's the bleeding-edge, art-of-the-moment, avant garde New Museum website.  You know this place is bleeding all over the edges because they have this image on their home page of a tongue bursting through cardboard.  That's the shit. 

newmuseum2.jpg

So what the hell are these "You Go Girls" doing representing membership posing with the pseudo-gangsta sign rabbit ear WTF OMG expressions??  Can I be a member of a museum that features guys sticking tongues out of cardboard and hang with the floozies shopping for Juicy Couture and memorizing Lady Gaga lyrics? 


Posted by lee sachs at 8:16 AM | | TrackBacks (0)

January 14, 2010

"Ya Want Handcuffs with That??"

In a more innocent time, one of the simple pleasures of childhood was "cookies and milk." 

Well times sure have changed.  Here in the cookie aisle is a sign of the times.  The milk is gone and it's "cookies and handcuffs."  So sad.  So very sad. 

handcuffs and cookies.jpg

product design, supermarkets
Posted by lee sachs at 11:43 PM | | TrackBacks (0)

January 10, 2010

No Signal For Sale

Here in the elegant, ultramodern Time Warner Center we find a striking monitor with a curious message.
TimeWarner_ERROR_wide.jpg

What could it be...???

messedupscreen_CU.jpg

What are you saying, oh great big blue screen???

messedupscreen_NO_SIGNLA.jpg

error messages, visual merchandising
Posted by lee sachs at 11:45 PM | | TrackBacks (0)

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This site is a creation of Lee Sachs and Cool Pillows, Inc. Yes, that's me, Lee Sachs (aka, coolpillows). If you have questions, comments, concerns, combustion or cartloads of other words that begin with "c," "k" or "q" please feel free to email me at lee DOT sachs at symbol gmail DOT com. (you can figure out what i'm trying to say there, right?)

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